If I Am Missing or Dead

If I Am Missing or Dead

Book - 2007
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In April 2002, Janine Latus's youngest sister, Amy, wrote a note and taped it to the inside of her desk drawer. "Today Ron Ball and I are romantically involved," it read, "but I fear I have placed myself at risk in a variety of ways. Based on his criminal past, writing this out just seems like the smart thing to do. If I am missing or dead this obviously has not protected me..." That same spring Janine Latus was struggling to leave her marriage -- a marriage to a handsome and successful man. A marriage others emulated. A marriage in which she felt she could do nothing right and everything wrong. A marriage in which she felt afraid, controlled, inadequate, and trapped. Ten weeks later, Janine Latus had left her marriage. She was on a business trip to the East Coast, savoring her freedom, attending a work conference, when she received a call from her sister Jane asking if she'd heard from Amy. Immediately, Janine's blood ran cold. Amy was missing. Helicopters went up and search dogs went out. Coworkers and neighbors and family members plastered missing posters with Amy's picture across the county. It took more than two weeks to find Amy's body, wrapped in a tarpaulin and buried at a building site. It took nearly two years before her killer, her former boyfriend Ron Ball, was sentenced for her murder. Amy died in silent fear and pain. Haunted by this, Janine Latus turned her journalistic eye inward. How, she wondered, did two seemingly well-adjusted, successful women end up in strings of physically or emotionally abusive relationships with men? "If I Am Missing or Dead" is a heart-wrenching journey of discovery as Janine Latus traces the roots of her own -- and her sister's --victimization with unflinching candor. This beautifully written memoir will move readers from the first to the last page. At once a confession, a call to break the cycle of abuse, and a deeply felt love letter to her baby sister, Amy Lynne Latus, "If I Am Missing or Dead" is an unforgettable read.
Publisher: New York ; Toronto : Simon & Schuster, c2007.
ISBN: 9780743296533
0743296532
Characteristics: 309 p. :,ill.

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m
MplsTA
Jul 17, 2017

The book leads up to the murder of the writer's sister. Until then, it seems to be about the bad choices in men the author and her sister made.

As I read this book, I tried not to shame/blame these women (victims) but I got frustrated that they kept getting into these long-term toxic relationships over and over again. Both were physically and mentally abused by their partners until one of them ended up being murdered by her abusive boyfriend after she ended the relationship.

This book left me with more questions than answers.

j
Jedwards2
May 12, 2013

Frustrating read, as most of the story has nothing to do with the murder of her sister but everything to do with her never ending crappy relationships with men.

n
nic03red
Apr 02, 2011

A memoir about a woman who finds herself in abusive relationships. Latus tells her story and her sister's who also is in an abusive realtionship with a man who will eventually murder her. It was interesting to get a glimpse into what life is like for women who are in abusive relationships. This memoir was heartbreaking. No family should have to go through this!

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